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| I wonder what that could be ?? |
Good morning, or if you're reading this at a different time of day then good ......... (insert period of day here), and welcome to another edition of Deans Weekly Blog. So what's been happening this week in this crazy mixed up world? Well the first story of the week that grabbed my attention was the story about the woman that got more than she bargained for when she went to that famous high street chain of restaurants that likes to put Mc in front of their dishes on the menu. If you read the news then you will have seen the photo's of the newest item on the menu the McChickenhead. If you haven't I've posted the photo here for you to look at. The thing is you can clearly see that it's a chicken head. There is nothing else in the world that it could possibly be, so how did it end up in this poor woman's box of chicken nuggets. Think about it for a second. Someone has coated the head in breadcrumbs, someone has put the head in the fryer, someone has taken the head out the fryer, and someone has served the head with the rest of the nuggets. And this is the problem. This restaurant is well known for employing, shall we say, below average workers with the intelligence of the things that they are frying (Except chicken heads of cause because they are clearly smarter). While ever you employ retards things like this will happen. I'm all for helping the less fortunate, but not putting them in positions of trust when they clearly can't even get themselves dressed correctly, let alone correctly identify the parts of a chicken that should and shouldn't be coated and fried.
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| I'm not putting it in there no way! |
This week I've been watching some documentaries on the TV, and I came across the possibly scariest animal that I've ever seen. No it's not a giant spider, that puts Boris (The big spider who used to live in the outdoor toilet block at my dad's garage, and used to pass you the toilet roll) to shame. No it isn't a snake with deadly venom that turns your insides into a milkshake. It isn't even a giant predator like a lion, or a tiger or a bear. What is it? I hear you ask (unless you've already looked at the picture and then you can see what it is) It's a Pacu which is a fish that is found mainly in south America and is a relative of the piranha. What makes this fish so scary though is the fact that it can grow to about 4 feet in length, it has human teeth that can tear and bite and it is slightly homosexual!. How can a fish be homosexual? I hear you ask (unless you've googled that question before) well lets just say that this fish has been know on numerous occasions to take a mouthful of cock every now and then. It apparently attacks the soft appendage, tears and bites the damn thing of leaving the person screaming in agony and bleeding to death. Now that's some scary shit (I bet that every man winced when I wrote that, and a few women too). I'm really glad I don't live in the amazon basin (and that isn't the washroom at the giant on line retailer, although I would imagine it could be quite a nice place to live with clean stalls, and a man who offers you a mint after you've had a pee) what with Piranha that can strip flesh off bone in seconds and the Pacu that has a taste, and likes to bite off gentleman sausages. I'm glad I live where I do, where the scariest thing you'll find in the river is a used tampon floating towards you.
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| #itssnowing |
Also this week if you look out of your window you will probably see a lot of white stuff on the ground. Unless your Kate Moss, then it will be on the table next to the mirror. What I can never understand about this country is that you would think that it has never ever snowed before. It's all that anyone has talked about all week. Social media has been full of people discussing the pros and cons of snow, and the fact that it is snowing. It's been driving me mad to be honest. You know when you are put in an awkward situation with someone that you don't really know, so you chat about the weather etc. It seems the entire country has been doing that this week. Now I'm not bashing those people that have, it's more a rant against those that act as if they haven't seen snow before. Let me straighten a few things out for you all. We live in a relatively cold country as we are quite far away from the more temperate zones near the equator. Thus in winter it gets cold, which usually results in ice and snow. Hence countries further away from the equator are even colder and it snows even more there i.e. the poles. In the summer it gets warmer so you don't get snow. Simples and if you don't understand that, I hear that they are taking on staff at the restaurant that fries chicken heads.
That's it for this week, so until then keep safe and don't go in the water.
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